Shame on me! My last posting was back in July. Why? Maybe because I had too many things going on. Excuse or no excuse, I shouldn’t have dropped the ball on the blog. So, just as a recap of the last 3, almost 4 months, I’ll just say my time was consumed by, training for the marathon, working full-time, playing recreational kickball (yes, it’s a sport for adults who like to “kick it” and drink some beer while at it), meeting new people, networking and just enjoying life to the fullest. So, looking back, I don’t know why I didn’t sit my butt down and write about it, since those were all great things.
But now that I’ve found myself with more “spare” time because I’ve cut back on some of the above (except from the full-time job, that’s the part of the equation that pays the bills : P). Now my time will be spent on preparing for the next big ‘out of the comfort zone’ move. Applying for GRAD SCHOOL!!!!!
I love California, the life I have here, the friends I’ve made, the happiness it has brought, the experiences, the volunteer work, the weekends filled with stuff to do, the new adventures, the challenges, the things I’ve done that I never thought I would or could (A.K.A marathon), … and now I want to add something else to the list…learning new things by immersing myself in school and everything that comes with.
Some will debate whether grad school would be a good choice or not, but for me it’s not a matter of choice. It’s a matter of commitment… to myself and the future that I want. I started my essays a long time ago, and now I’ll need to sit my butt down, just as I’ll do with the blog, and put everything “out there”. Grad school is about taking a leap into a world of opportunities, and that’s all I’m about. The life I have right now is good, is comfortable. But, it’s time to take it up a notch and see what else I can accomplish!
Grad school here I come… fingers crossed!!!
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
New found respect...
This last Saturday I ran the farthest ever... 10 miles!!!!! First time double digits!!!! Woo hooo!! I had never done any sports, so I never knew I had it in me!!!
I think that’s why lately I've had this new found respect for athletes. I'm only going to be training 5 days a week, for 4 months, and to think about how much athletes train to win championships, break records, etc., just makes me want to 'take my hat off'. I never knew of all the hard work and level of commitment it entailed.
I had always thought to myself it was ridiculous to pay millions of dollars to athletes just for 'playing some sport', but now I think of it differently. Although I still think that millions of dollars is still a lot of money to pay someone, I respect all the hard work that happens before, during and after each and every game that most of us don’t get to see.
If you are an athlete, give yourself a ‘pat on the back’… you are doing something that most people don’t even think possible... I was one of them.
P.S. If you want to know more about my training with the Leukemia and Lympoma's Team In Training, join my Facebook group "Help Zilaida reach her goal". Or, if you want to make a donation go to: http://www.active.com/donate/tntsvmb/zilaida
I think that’s why lately I've had this new found respect for athletes. I'm only going to be training 5 days a week, for 4 months, and to think about how much athletes train to win championships, break records, etc., just makes me want to 'take my hat off'. I never knew of all the hard work and level of commitment it entailed.
I had always thought to myself it was ridiculous to pay millions of dollars to athletes just for 'playing some sport', but now I think of it differently. Although I still think that millions of dollars is still a lot of money to pay someone, I respect all the hard work that happens before, during and after each and every game that most of us don’t get to see.
If you are an athlete, give yourself a ‘pat on the back’… you are doing something that most people don’t even think possible... I was one of them.
P.S. If you want to know more about my training with the Leukemia and Lympoma's Team In Training, join my Facebook group "Help Zilaida reach her goal". Or, if you want to make a donation go to: http://www.active.com/donate/tntsvmb/zilaida
Thursday, June 28, 2007
I'm back and running a marathon!!!!
So, I’ve done it again. I’ve pushed myself out of the comfort zone one more time. This time physically. So, no more couch potato, no more excuses or I’ll start on Monday. Yup, ‘cause this time I signed up to run my first marathon as part of the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society’s Team In Training!! Me running a marathon and I’ve never done any sports!!
And now, after only 3 weeks of training I’m soooo hooked!!! I still have 4 more months until the event and I’m already thinking about next season. Through Team in Training I’ve met incredible people whose life stories have inspired me and turned a light back on that had been blown out by a storm a while back.
Although I can’t complaint about how my life has been since I moved to California, this experience has brought back the Zilaida that I was back in college when I was joggling going to school full time, working part time, running a students’ association and networking within my field. I used to look back and reminisce “oh, those day”, but not no more. Now I embrace the present, make the most out of it and look forward to what’s yet to come.
Three weeks of training, Monday-Thursday and Saturday runs, and I’ve already ran 4.5 miles and will be going for 6 this Saturday. Imagine that! After this Saturday I’ll still have 20 more miles to go to complete the 26.2 miles of a marathon, but I’m on my way!
I’ve noticed my body responding to the intense training, and slowly see that those pains and aches slowly become ‘just part of it’ and fade away. I’ve been told that it's that my body is just getting used to its new regimen. I guess so.
Can’t wait to see what these next 4 months are going to be like and all the Saturday runs all over the bay area that are said to be just beautiful!
P.S. To learn more about the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society and/ or donate to the cause go to: http://www.active.com/donate/tntsvmb/zilaida
And now, after only 3 weeks of training I’m soooo hooked!!! I still have 4 more months until the event and I’m already thinking about next season. Through Team in Training I’ve met incredible people whose life stories have inspired me and turned a light back on that had been blown out by a storm a while back.
Although I can’t complaint about how my life has been since I moved to California, this experience has brought back the Zilaida that I was back in college when I was joggling going to school full time, working part time, running a students’ association and networking within my field. I used to look back and reminisce “oh, those day”, but not no more. Now I embrace the present, make the most out of it and look forward to what’s yet to come.
Three weeks of training, Monday-Thursday and Saturday runs, and I’ve already ran 4.5 miles and will be going for 6 this Saturday. Imagine that! After this Saturday I’ll still have 20 more miles to go to complete the 26.2 miles of a marathon, but I’m on my way!
I’ve noticed my body responding to the intense training, and slowly see that those pains and aches slowly become ‘just part of it’ and fade away. I’ve been told that it's that my body is just getting used to its new regimen. I guess so.
Can’t wait to see what these next 4 months are going to be like and all the Saturday runs all over the bay area that are said to be just beautiful!
P.S. To learn more about the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society and/ or donate to the cause go to: http://www.active.com/donate/tntsvmb/zilaida
Friday, May 11, 2007
Family, mofongo and some things here and there
So, I can’t get enough at how life turns around by 360 degrees and shows you its best side. After a long, long year in Colorado, trying to find myself, lost in a world where either you got up and start running, or you’d be hit by a train, not literally, although it did hit hard, finding a place in sunny California where life is good, reminds me of the many blessings received.
Not only that, but today, while sitting down watching my mom cook mofongo for me, one of my favorite dishes in the world, I keep counting my blessings. I flew in to Champaign, Illinois, yesterday, to watch my brother receive his Masters degree, and spent some time with my family. Since I was going to this big event (it is a big event for all of us) I got my mom to fly with plantains so she would cook for me!!! BTW, my mom’s the best!!
Still trying to put into words how blessed I’m feeling right now...the smell of bacon, plantain, chicken and all the good stuff that will make my mofongo (just Google it!!!) taste so good, is making my mouth ‘water’, and my brain space out.
Though, I’m slightly coming back… my brother is clapping and dancing as he watches my mom cook and it is just too funny … it will be soooo good, sorry you all can’t have a taste of it…
Isn’t life just a delight? Buen provecho too me! Bon appétit Zilaida!!
Not only that, but today, while sitting down watching my mom cook mofongo for me, one of my favorite dishes in the world, I keep counting my blessings. I flew in to Champaign, Illinois, yesterday, to watch my brother receive his Masters degree, and spent some time with my family. Since I was going to this big event (it is a big event for all of us) I got my mom to fly with plantains so she would cook for me!!! BTW, my mom’s the best!!
Still trying to put into words how blessed I’m feeling right now...the smell of bacon, plantain, chicken and all the good stuff that will make my mofongo (just Google it!!!) taste so good, is making my mouth ‘water’, and my brain space out.
Though, I’m slightly coming back… my brother is clapping and dancing as he watches my mom cook and it is just too funny … it will be soooo good, sorry you all can’t have a taste of it…
Isn’t life just a delight? Buen provecho too me! Bon appétit Zilaida!!
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Condiment your life
Haven’t you felt, at least once in your life, that there’s something missing? You feel like you are stuck in a TV commercial and you watch yourself do the same thing, over and over again. Just the same old, same old. Well, lately, give or take, I’ve been watching my life like a TV commercial. So, I thought I needed to shake things up, put some condiment in my life (if my boss would read this blog he’d be laughing right at this moment, since I’m always screwing up catch-phrases). Yeah, I said condiment and not spice. Heck, if I’m going to shake things up, I better flavor my life with condiments, not spices. Growing up I always heard, ‘put some condiment on it for flavor’, not put some spice on it, so I’m sticking to condiments.
The question I had been asking is what condiment I should put on it. How can I shake things up? Should I try the bake and shake with some Honey BBQ flavor? (yeah, yeah, it’s shake and bake and not vice versa. I know, I’m just shaking things up) Well, joke aside, today I came across with this one song that goes with the shaking things up attitude. Well, somehow, but it does go along the awesome day I had yesterday.
The overall message of the song is you only live once. So, it tells you to give in to love and passion… forget about what other people say or what might be… don’t stress out and get depressed, just “turn the TV off” (good, because I won’t have to see my commercial again), and “turn the radio on and let the rhythm feel you in”. And, yesterday, for the first time after I can’t remember how long, that’s what I did. I let me be me. I laughed out loud you could have heard me 100 feet away, I called BULL SHITTT!!!!, I shook my booty when I hit home, although I was out, in front of a bunch of strangers and so much more. And no, I wasn’t drunk. I was just playing a game of good old fashion kick ball, with a twist… did someone say beer?
I had not had so much fun in a long time. With all these "strangers" I was me. That is, someone who’s loud, thinks is funny, dances with or without music, claps when laughs… and that was just fine!
So, I’m thinking I found my condiment… it’s called BE YOU. Sometimes we lose ourselves, for whatever reason, and things become dull. Then, somehow, we find ourselves, our condiment, and life becomes flavored. I’m letting my inner self come out, bit by bit. If you can’t handle it, take some Tums, Milanta or whatever. I’m shaking things up, and so should you.
Still thinking about the song? Well, it's old, is in Spanish, the video is old and kinda weird , but follow this link, and ENJOY! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LxrUkFQHYpg
The question I had been asking is what condiment I should put on it. How can I shake things up? Should I try the bake and shake with some Honey BBQ flavor? (yeah, yeah, it’s shake and bake and not vice versa. I know, I’m just shaking things up) Well, joke aside, today I came across with this one song that goes with the shaking things up attitude. Well, somehow, but it does go along the awesome day I had yesterday.
The overall message of the song is you only live once. So, it tells you to give in to love and passion… forget about what other people say or what might be… don’t stress out and get depressed, just “turn the TV off” (good, because I won’t have to see my commercial again), and “turn the radio on and let the rhythm feel you in”. And, yesterday, for the first time after I can’t remember how long, that’s what I did. I let me be me. I laughed out loud you could have heard me 100 feet away, I called BULL SHITTT!!!!, I shook my booty when I hit home, although I was out, in front of a bunch of strangers and so much more. And no, I wasn’t drunk. I was just playing a game of good old fashion kick ball, with a twist… did someone say beer?
I had not had so much fun in a long time. With all these "strangers" I was me. That is, someone who’s loud, thinks is funny, dances with or without music, claps when laughs… and that was just fine!
So, I’m thinking I found my condiment… it’s called BE YOU. Sometimes we lose ourselves, for whatever reason, and things become dull. Then, somehow, we find ourselves, our condiment, and life becomes flavored. I’m letting my inner self come out, bit by bit. If you can’t handle it, take some Tums, Milanta or whatever. I’m shaking things up, and so should you.
Still thinking about the song? Well, it's old, is in Spanish, the video is old and kinda weird , but follow this link, and ENJOY! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LxrUkFQHYpg
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Not your typical knock-knock joke
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
The UPS.
The UPS guy?
Remember those knocks on the door I had talked about in my previous blog? (Oh, if you have not read it, now would be a dandy time to do so) So it turns out that my roommate had ordered a new phone and UPS was going to deliver it. If I had only known this, I would have saved myself several minutes of feeling scared and more than a few of feeling stupid. Because not only did I do all the screaming, calling for a rescuer and cried in front of the policeman shi-bang, but I did all of these because the UPS guy is hearing impaired.
Yup, you read it. When I came back from work on Friday I saw a box on the living room table. So, I asked my roommate if that was the “thing” to blame for the entire riot and he said: Yeah, and oh, I don’t think the UPS guy can hear. Right after he said that I could actually hear Homer Simpson going Do’h!
At least this whole story broke the ice and started off several nice conversations. The best one was with the brave young girl I briefly mentioned about in one of last month’s blogs; the teenager who has had a harder life than most people I know, combined.
Well, after two months of “living” at the children’s shelter, yesterday she moved to a place an hour an a half away from here. So, since I knew she was moving, I picked her up on Friday to take her to the one place she had told me she wanted to go, a pizza place called Round Table. On our way there I was telling her my UPS story, and for at least 5 minutes I had her laughing. By the end of the story she gave me her usual…that’s stupid and that made my whole ordeal worth wild. And that’s because I already know that her “how stupid” is what “dude”, “hella” or “are you serious?” are for others. Plus, I was actually expecting her to say it. If she said it, it meant she was paying attention, and if she was paying attention to this story, it meant that more than having a teenager to help out to the best of my capability, I have a friend.
I’m glad my story was a nice ice breaker and it made some laugh. I’ll be happier if my friend reads this blog one day because this next joke is dedicated to her. It's not your typical Knock, Knock joke, but she’ll get it. And that’s all it matters. I can hear her now, just as I could hear Homer…
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Arr u…
Arr u who?
Are you thinking how stupid?
Who’s there?
The UPS.
The UPS guy?
Remember those knocks on the door I had talked about in my previous blog? (Oh, if you have not read it, now would be a dandy time to do so) So it turns out that my roommate had ordered a new phone and UPS was going to deliver it. If I had only known this, I would have saved myself several minutes of feeling scared and more than a few of feeling stupid. Because not only did I do all the screaming, calling for a rescuer and cried in front of the policeman shi-bang, but I did all of these because the UPS guy is hearing impaired.
Yup, you read it. When I came back from work on Friday I saw a box on the living room table. So, I asked my roommate if that was the “thing” to blame for the entire riot and he said: Yeah, and oh, I don’t think the UPS guy can hear. Right after he said that I could actually hear Homer Simpson going Do’h!
At least this whole story broke the ice and started off several nice conversations. The best one was with the brave young girl I briefly mentioned about in one of last month’s blogs; the teenager who has had a harder life than most people I know, combined.
Well, after two months of “living” at the children’s shelter, yesterday she moved to a place an hour an a half away from here. So, since I knew she was moving, I picked her up on Friday to take her to the one place she had told me she wanted to go, a pizza place called Round Table. On our way there I was telling her my UPS story, and for at least 5 minutes I had her laughing. By the end of the story she gave me her usual…that’s stupid and that made my whole ordeal worth wild. And that’s because I already know that her “how stupid” is what “dude”, “hella” or “are you serious?” are for others. Plus, I was actually expecting her to say it. If she said it, it meant she was paying attention, and if she was paying attention to this story, it meant that more than having a teenager to help out to the best of my capability, I have a friend.
I’m glad my story was a nice ice breaker and it made some laugh. I’ll be happier if my friend reads this blog one day because this next joke is dedicated to her. It's not your typical Knock, Knock joke, but she’ll get it. And that’s all it matters. I can hear her now, just as I could hear Homer…
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Arr u…
Arr u who?
Are you thinking how stupid?
Friday, April 20, 2007
Wake up call
Today I had a wake up call. Not just your daily ‘it’s time to go to work’ one. This time it was one of those hotel wake you up calls that make you jump out of your bed and get your heart pounding so hard, you think you might be having a heart-attack (ok, so it’s not THAT bad, but seriously, aren’t those just darn annoying?) Today, I had my “Miss Salgueiro, this is your wake up-knock on the door-it’s time for your reality check call of the year.
So, here’s what happened. I was sitting on my comfy chair watching TV when someone knocked at my door so hard I literally jumped out of the chair. I asked who it was and nobody answered. Who ever it was knocked again way harder, so hard that I though he/she was going to knock it down. I kept asking who it was and still no answer. And then my heart starts pounding so hard I thought it was going to jump out of my chest. And then a third knock comes along and I started screaming I’d call 911 if he/she didn’t tell me who it was… and STILL no answer.
In 5 split seconds I grabbed my cell phone, scrambled through my head for names of who I could call and bang… ‘wake up call’… I didn’t know/have who to call. It’s not an emergency, I thought, so I couldn’t call 911. My one friend who I knew would stop doing whatever she was doing and come running is out of town, so I couldn’t call her. My roommate had left 20 minutes earlier and I thought he might think I was stupid. I ended up calling my friend’s roommate, since they live 5 minutes away, and got no answered. I did end up finding someone to call, although I still thought he would think I was stupid, but he answered and he was willing to drive 30 minutes to get here.
In between those 5 split seconds and the 30 minutes that would take for my rescuer to arrive, the police knocked on my door (hint: I did call my roommate and he had called the police). I busted into tears as I was telling my story about the 3 knocks on the door, how nobody would answer and how frustrating all this was for me since I could not have been able to see who could it have been since I am too short to actually be able to look through the “peep-hole”.
And here’s where the stupid part ACTUALLY comes in. It wasn’t that I had jumped out off my chair by a frantic knock on the door, it wasn’t that I grabbed air freshener to spray the knocker’s eyes in case he made his way into my apartment, it wasn’t that I cried more than when I saw the end of Armageddon (yeah, the movie) an hour earlier, nor the fact that I had not felt so alone since I had moved to 'the states' and stepped out of my comfort zone, one year and a half ago.
Nop, it was when the policeman asked me if the UPS guy had stopped by earlier. Yup, THIS is right exactly were I started feeling way stupid. I turn around and find this UPS package slit sticked to the door. In less than 3 split seconds I put all the pieces together. To help you out in case you haven’t yet, the UPS guy had been the knocker who 25-30 minutes earlier had scared the hell out of me!!!
So there you go…3 knocks on the door, 5 split seconds of rambling in my head for a rescuer and 1 reality check and I’m back on my feet again in 30 minutes. The fact is that, no matter how strong and independent one might be, there will come times when we'll need of others. Period. I just hope that if you are ever in the same situation, you’ll have someone on speed dial and be safe and sound in 1 split second. I also hope that second time around, so would I.
So, here’s what happened. I was sitting on my comfy chair watching TV when someone knocked at my door so hard I literally jumped out of the chair. I asked who it was and nobody answered. Who ever it was knocked again way harder, so hard that I though he/she was going to knock it down. I kept asking who it was and still no answer. And then my heart starts pounding so hard I thought it was going to jump out of my chest. And then a third knock comes along and I started screaming I’d call 911 if he/she didn’t tell me who it was… and STILL no answer.
In 5 split seconds I grabbed my cell phone, scrambled through my head for names of who I could call and bang… ‘wake up call’… I didn’t know/have who to call. It’s not an emergency, I thought, so I couldn’t call 911. My one friend who I knew would stop doing whatever she was doing and come running is out of town, so I couldn’t call her. My roommate had left 20 minutes earlier and I thought he might think I was stupid. I ended up calling my friend’s roommate, since they live 5 minutes away, and got no answered. I did end up finding someone to call, although I still thought he would think I was stupid, but he answered and he was willing to drive 30 minutes to get here.
In between those 5 split seconds and the 30 minutes that would take for my rescuer to arrive, the police knocked on my door (hint: I did call my roommate and he had called the police). I busted into tears as I was telling my story about the 3 knocks on the door, how nobody would answer and how frustrating all this was for me since I could not have been able to see who could it have been since I am too short to actually be able to look through the “peep-hole”.
And here’s where the stupid part ACTUALLY comes in. It wasn’t that I had jumped out off my chair by a frantic knock on the door, it wasn’t that I grabbed air freshener to spray the knocker’s eyes in case he made his way into my apartment, it wasn’t that I cried more than when I saw the end of Armageddon (yeah, the movie) an hour earlier, nor the fact that I had not felt so alone since I had moved to 'the states' and stepped out of my comfort zone, one year and a half ago.
Nop, it was when the policeman asked me if the UPS guy had stopped by earlier. Yup, THIS is right exactly were I started feeling way stupid. I turn around and find this UPS package slit sticked to the door. In less than 3 split seconds I put all the pieces together. To help you out in case you haven’t yet, the UPS guy had been the knocker who 25-30 minutes earlier had scared the hell out of me!!!
So there you go…3 knocks on the door, 5 split seconds of rambling in my head for a rescuer and 1 reality check and I’m back on my feet again in 30 minutes. The fact is that, no matter how strong and independent one might be, there will come times when we'll need of others. Period. I just hope that if you are ever in the same situation, you’ll have someone on speed dial and be safe and sound in 1 split second. I also hope that second time around, so would I.
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Take the “just get over it exit” right after the “so what”
Ok, bare with me; I’ve taken the ‘what is life if not what we make it to be road’, and can’t seem to get myself off of it. I guess by now we are more than aware that the older we get, the faster time seems to go by. Probably because life starts to take the “routine” road and we wake up when our alarm tells us to wake up, we do what we usually do every M-F, and try to make the most out of the weekends.
And yet, although we know it is not going to happen, we are always looking for ways to slow down the clock or get on the “go back in time” road. Perhaps because half the time we are living in denial and the other half we are just still trying to figure things out. So we believe that, by thinking that time might just slow down or that we’ll be one of the firsts to get on board on that time machine, we’ll actually be able to get back to that “unfinished business” road, to that “childhood memory that defined our adulthood” street or on the “one-to many times” highway and be able to make a U turn.
I'm glad to say that at least after a long way on the ‘just get over it’ and the ‘so what’, I’ve managed to get myself on “the life you’ve always wanted” road. I still have a lot of miles to go but, gosh, I know I'll get there. Though, if I had only had a GPS system integrated since the day I was born or if I had done a Mapquest search first, I know I would have save myself a lot of time. But, such is life.
I'll keep it short, got to save some time. I’ve hit the road, and I ain’t turning back. I’ll see you there if you take the same exit.
And yet, although we know it is not going to happen, we are always looking for ways to slow down the clock or get on the “go back in time” road. Perhaps because half the time we are living in denial and the other half we are just still trying to figure things out. So we believe that, by thinking that time might just slow down or that we’ll be one of the firsts to get on board on that time machine, we’ll actually be able to get back to that “unfinished business” road, to that “childhood memory that defined our adulthood” street or on the “one-to many times” highway and be able to make a U turn.
I'm glad to say that at least after a long way on the ‘just get over it’ and the ‘so what’, I’ve managed to get myself on “the life you’ve always wanted” road. I still have a lot of miles to go but, gosh, I know I'll get there. Though, if I had only had a GPS system integrated since the day I was born or if I had done a Mapquest search first, I know I would have save myself a lot of time. But, such is life.
I'll keep it short, got to save some time. I’ve hit the road, and I ain’t turning back. I’ll see you there if you take the same exit.
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
On your mark, get set, go dating!!!
Yeah, so lately I’ve been writing about dating a lot. Maybe that’s because I have been giving it a try for the first time. And, coming from someone who has dedicated most of her “adult years” concentrating on other things other than a love life, it IS a huge step. Heck, I still remember one of the first conversations I had with my roommate when I moved in six months ago and I laugh at myself. I recall saying that I just wasn’t into that whole dating ‘thing’. Isn’t it funny how six months can change your ‘perspective’ about things?
And what is it about it that just makes it such a profitable industry (‘it’ IS an industry)? We hear about ‘it’ all the time. Hundreds of books talk about the dos and don’ts. Some even pride themselves on being experts on the subject manner and get paid for their “professional advice”. Truth is I’m not even close to the latter. I’m just one of the thousands of singles mixing it up in search for the ‘perfect’ match that will walk along the journey and become a partner in crime. I’m just one of the thousands that hit the night scene, go to parks, go online, etc. etc., with our eyes wide open “just in case”. You name it we’ve done it. Actually, some of us have not done it all; I still think that the ‘speed dating’ thing is a bit too awkward for my taste.
Though, I must say that, if thousands of us are still searching for the ‘perfect match’ it means one of two things, either there are a lot of us really messed up inside, or there are a lot of us who are looking for that deeper relationship where two become one and life is just great. I like to think it’s option number two.
I’ve seen so many so called relationships where things are obviously not going well, and probably not even started well at all and scratch my head thinking how, where, WHY!!!!! I’ve come to think that some are so afraid of ending up alone that they jump at the first glimpse of “love”. But for what? Just to end up broken hearted and back to square one. That’s why I’m sticking to option number two up there.
I don’t want to end up in a relationship asking myself five, ten years later, why I even started it in the first place. I do want to be in a relationship in which five, ten years from the moment that we meet, I’ll still be as happy with sharing my life with him, the ups and downs, the roller coasters, the ‘bed, bath and beyond’ as I felt the moment I decided to take a chance on love.
And, the game is on. though, it’s not about winning or losing, or who gets there first. It's about taking one more step towards the relationship you want. So, are you prepared to put on your running (or walking) shoes or would yourather just seat on the sofa and scratch your belly waiting for prince/princess charming to knock on your door? I know I’m ready. Are you?
And what is it about it that just makes it such a profitable industry (‘it’ IS an industry)? We hear about ‘it’ all the time. Hundreds of books talk about the dos and don’ts. Some even pride themselves on being experts on the subject manner and get paid for their “professional advice”. Truth is I’m not even close to the latter. I’m just one of the thousands of singles mixing it up in search for the ‘perfect’ match that will walk along the journey and become a partner in crime. I’m just one of the thousands that hit the night scene, go to parks, go online, etc. etc., with our eyes wide open “just in case”. You name it we’ve done it. Actually, some of us have not done it all; I still think that the ‘speed dating’ thing is a bit too awkward for my taste.
Though, I must say that, if thousands of us are still searching for the ‘perfect match’ it means one of two things, either there are a lot of us really messed up inside, or there are a lot of us who are looking for that deeper relationship where two become one and life is just great. I like to think it’s option number two.
I’ve seen so many so called relationships where things are obviously not going well, and probably not even started well at all and scratch my head thinking how, where, WHY!!!!! I’ve come to think that some are so afraid of ending up alone that they jump at the first glimpse of “love”. But for what? Just to end up broken hearted and back to square one. That’s why I’m sticking to option number two up there.
I don’t want to end up in a relationship asking myself five, ten years later, why I even started it in the first place. I do want to be in a relationship in which five, ten years from the moment that we meet, I’ll still be as happy with sharing my life with him, the ups and downs, the roller coasters, the ‘bed, bath and beyond’ as I felt the moment I decided to take a chance on love.
And, the game is on. though, it’s not about winning or losing, or who gets there first. It's about taking one more step towards the relationship you want. So, are you prepared to put on your running (or walking) shoes or would yourather just seat on the sofa and scratch your belly waiting for prince/princess charming to knock on your door? I know I’m ready. Are you?
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
Spring cleaning
Armed with ‘I’ve had enough with this room been so cluttered’ thoughts, and an unopened divine bottle of Moscato Bianco wine, I decided to take on the task of doing some spring cleaning. Yeah, I decided to just get rid of piles of paper that will not make my tax refund magically increase, or even appear for what it’s worth, since none of my receipts from the supermarket, Friday nights out, Chipotle, not even Starbucks, will somehow become tax deductions. Although I’ve made my fair contributions to Starbucks!
But oh, if it wasn’t for that bottle… more than half way, let’s say 77% almost done, (I just like the number 7), Spring cleaning turned into tipsy dialing. Which is a drunken dialing kind of scenario, just a bit less drunk. Get it? And I know you must be thinking, but it’s Monday!!! But, didn’t I say I was having Moscato Bianco wine, with a hint of honey, oh just so delicious, while doing some Spring cleaning?!
Spring cleaning turned into let me open that bottle that has been sitting for 3 weeks, opening the bottle turned into tipsy dialing and tipsy dialing turned it to, ‘why can’t I forget that number’?!?!?!? (I needed more than 3 combined with exclamation points, sorry). But I guess we all do it. Don’t we? We all want to be ‘out there’. Just step out of the comfort zone and see what’s ‘out there’. But, before we jump, we just have to make that phone call, or whatever works best for each: burn letters, put away picture albums, etc. etc. For me it was a spring cleaning Monday afternoon tipsy calling. Well, I’ve tried the delete # from cell phone, put away all the pictures, sending ‘before the year ends note’, and blah blah blah. I guess it hasn’t worked 100% accurate after all. But, spring is here and I want to be ‘out there’.
So, I’m glad I had the wine, I’m glad I made the call, and I’m glad his phone was dead. It is spring… when flowers bloom, “the sun is shinning and the weather is sweet”. I’ll keep enjoying my wine, finish my spring cleaning and just keep pushing myself out of my comfort zone… one baby step at a time.
But oh, if it wasn’t for that bottle… more than half way, let’s say 77% almost done, (I just like the number 7), Spring cleaning turned into tipsy dialing. Which is a drunken dialing kind of scenario, just a bit less drunk. Get it? And I know you must be thinking, but it’s Monday!!! But, didn’t I say I was having Moscato Bianco wine, with a hint of honey, oh just so delicious, while doing some Spring cleaning?!
Spring cleaning turned into let me open that bottle that has been sitting for 3 weeks, opening the bottle turned into tipsy dialing and tipsy dialing turned it to, ‘why can’t I forget that number’?!?!?!? (I needed more than 3 combined with exclamation points, sorry). But I guess we all do it. Don’t we? We all want to be ‘out there’. Just step out of the comfort zone and see what’s ‘out there’. But, before we jump, we just have to make that phone call, or whatever works best for each: burn letters, put away picture albums, etc. etc. For me it was a spring cleaning Monday afternoon tipsy calling. Well, I’ve tried the delete # from cell phone, put away all the pictures, sending ‘before the year ends note’, and blah blah blah. I guess it hasn’t worked 100% accurate after all. But, spring is here and I want to be ‘out there’.
So, I’m glad I had the wine, I’m glad I made the call, and I’m glad his phone was dead. It is spring… when flowers bloom, “the sun is shinning and the weather is sweet”. I’ll keep enjoying my wine, finish my spring cleaning and just keep pushing myself out of my comfort zone… one baby step at a time.
Sunday, April 8, 2007
Whatever will be, will be.
So I’m back home after the 3 weeks of running on roller blades and I just can’t get myself away from this damn thing called computer. I guess I’m compensating from the time lost, though not lost at all.
Although my weekend started off a bit hectic, as I had a two hour delay on my flight back to San Jose, I can’t complaint how it has all worked out. It just so happened that the way the cards were put on the table turned out a fairly good hand. Friday night concert listening to Colombian music that let my hips shake the way the love to shake, Saturday napping all day recovering from all the skipped night sleep, and Sunday afternoon filled with delight, a trip down memory lane and a new story just developing.
I’ve always said that things are meant to happen just the way they do, and lately, more than ever, I’ve made it my motto. What’s meant to happen will happen. Whatever will be, will be. So, why bother looking for answers. Why go around rambling questions that will just turn into a loop instead of a straight line with a beginning and an end?
I can’t wait to see what the next few weeks are going to be as the new story unfolds, while I just sit back and enjoy the ride. Not too long ago I read a book that said that in life you just have to ‘let go of the outcome’, as in not to put too much pressure on yourself over things that, if they are meant to happen or not, is just out of your hands. So, I’ll just relax and let things be. I’ll let go of the outcome and embrace life. After all, isn’t life just dandy?
Although my weekend started off a bit hectic, as I had a two hour delay on my flight back to San Jose, I can’t complaint how it has all worked out. It just so happened that the way the cards were put on the table turned out a fairly good hand. Friday night concert listening to Colombian music that let my hips shake the way the love to shake, Saturday napping all day recovering from all the skipped night sleep, and Sunday afternoon filled with delight, a trip down memory lane and a new story just developing.
I’ve always said that things are meant to happen just the way they do, and lately, more than ever, I’ve made it my motto. What’s meant to happen will happen. Whatever will be, will be. So, why bother looking for answers. Why go around rambling questions that will just turn into a loop instead of a straight line with a beginning and an end?
I can’t wait to see what the next few weeks are going to be as the new story unfolds, while I just sit back and enjoy the ride. Not too long ago I read a book that said that in life you just have to ‘let go of the outcome’, as in not to put too much pressure on yourself over things that, if they are meant to happen or not, is just out of your hands. So, I’ll just relax and let things be. I’ll let go of the outcome and embrace life. After all, isn’t life just dandy?
Tuesday, April 3, 2007
Roller blades, puzzles and a glimpse of it all
Isn’t life just funny? For the last 3 weeks my life has been running in full speed as if I had put on roller blades fueled by dynamite. And, although I’ve been complaining about how I haven’t had time to relax, to just ‘scratch my belly’ and smell the roses, truth is I guess, I wouldn’t have had it any other way.
For as long as I can remember I had always pictured my life running around from one plane ride to the other, giving presentations and just living the fast life. And, for the last few weeks, more or less, I’ve had a taste of that. Although almost coming to an end, at least for a couple of months now, I’m just glad that I’ve been able to get a glimpse of it all. And, although my gym membership is laughing its behind at me, I’ve been able to get a test ride of the life I once talked about at one of those “almost graduating from high school/what the heck will you do for the rest of your life/career orientations”.
In these 3 weeks of the ‘oh so jet set life’ I’ve come across with wonderful people that somehow are paving the way to that life that I’ve been daydreaming about for so long. Although they might not know it, those conversations in the car on our way to the airport or to the next hotel, have kept repeating in my head. Although they might not know it, they’ve given me some pieces to the puzzle I’ve started putting together of the life I can see myself already having.
And now, while sitting down on a bed with sheets and pillows that are just so damn comfortable, I’m grabbing the bull by its horns… Oh well, at least the life that has been running on roller blades for the last weeks, and I can only help to smile while I put the pieces down and see my puzzle just coming together.
For as long as I can remember I had always pictured my life running around from one plane ride to the other, giving presentations and just living the fast life. And, for the last few weeks, more or less, I’ve had a taste of that. Although almost coming to an end, at least for a couple of months now, I’m just glad that I’ve been able to get a glimpse of it all. And, although my gym membership is laughing its behind at me, I’ve been able to get a test ride of the life I once talked about at one of those “almost graduating from high school/what the heck will you do for the rest of your life/career orientations”.
In these 3 weeks of the ‘oh so jet set life’ I’ve come across with wonderful people that somehow are paving the way to that life that I’ve been daydreaming about for so long. Although they might not know it, those conversations in the car on our way to the airport or to the next hotel, have kept repeating in my head. Although they might not know it, they’ve given me some pieces to the puzzle I’ve started putting together of the life I can see myself already having.
And now, while sitting down on a bed with sheets and pillows that are just so damn comfortable, I’m grabbing the bull by its horns… Oh well, at least the life that has been running on roller blades for the last weeks, and I can only help to smile while I put the pieces down and see my puzzle just coming together.
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Putting all the pieces together
So lately I’ve been thinking about, I guess, too many things. How fast time is going, the next book I want to read, how many pounds I want to lose, what I want to do in sunny California (now that it’s warmer up in my area), going back to school, starting the book, how much money I want to save (ahem, get out of debt first of course), what I want to do ‘when I grow up’… and the thoughts just keep coming.
I guess we all have a million things running inside our heads that somehow, someway, we just have to make it all come together. But, how do we do that? How can we keep track of everything and don’t have anything falling through the cracks? I see so many people running there lives, literally, and they all look like they just know how to keep it together. I guess been young, or as most people tell me “just starting off”, I still have a long way to go before I figure that one out. If it wasn’t that I still just want to grab a big chunk of the pie, NOW!
And not just one pie, I want to take big chunks out of a bunch of pies. And it seems that my pies are ‘way up there’. Some might call me a dreamer; I like to think of myself as a believer. I believe I’ll lose those 5-7 pounds I’ve been dragging, I believe I’ll get in to the grad school I want to go to, I believe I’ll get to write the book, I believe I’ll be where I want to be five years from now. But, I also believe that I have to work for all of those things. So, NOW I’m doing the hard work. NOW I’m exercising (although I have been slacking a bit this last week). NOW I’m getting out of that horrible disease called credit card debt so that I don’t drag that into grad school. NOW I’m putting my thoughts on paper so that I can have the ‘warm up’ for the book. NOW, I think, I’m putting all the pieces together so that I can have the ‘grown up life’ I’ve been dreaming about, a few years down the road.
I do know that a lot of things take time. I don’t want to say I’ve learned it the hard way, but it hasn’t been the easiest way either. But I’m willing to do the work NOW, and try to put all the pieces together. I’ll have my piece of the pie; heck, maybe I’ll have the entire pie. As long as I can look back and contemplate how it all came together and be proud of myself, I’ll be happy with all the effort. Even if I can’t have a piece of every single pie I wanted, the life that I’m living NOW makes it all worth while. Plus, if I can’t have a piece of the ‘creamy chocolate cheese pie’, then at least I'll know I saved half the calories of one of those 5-7 pounds I’m working on NOW!
I guess we all have a million things running inside our heads that somehow, someway, we just have to make it all come together. But, how do we do that? How can we keep track of everything and don’t have anything falling through the cracks? I see so many people running there lives, literally, and they all look like they just know how to keep it together. I guess been young, or as most people tell me “just starting off”, I still have a long way to go before I figure that one out. If it wasn’t that I still just want to grab a big chunk of the pie, NOW!
And not just one pie, I want to take big chunks out of a bunch of pies. And it seems that my pies are ‘way up there’. Some might call me a dreamer; I like to think of myself as a believer. I believe I’ll lose those 5-7 pounds I’ve been dragging, I believe I’ll get in to the grad school I want to go to, I believe I’ll get to write the book, I believe I’ll be where I want to be five years from now. But, I also believe that I have to work for all of those things. So, NOW I’m doing the hard work. NOW I’m exercising (although I have been slacking a bit this last week). NOW I’m getting out of that horrible disease called credit card debt so that I don’t drag that into grad school. NOW I’m putting my thoughts on paper so that I can have the ‘warm up’ for the book. NOW, I think, I’m putting all the pieces together so that I can have the ‘grown up life’ I’ve been dreaming about, a few years down the road.
I do know that a lot of things take time. I don’t want to say I’ve learned it the hard way, but it hasn’t been the easiest way either. But I’m willing to do the work NOW, and try to put all the pieces together. I’ll have my piece of the pie; heck, maybe I’ll have the entire pie. As long as I can look back and contemplate how it all came together and be proud of myself, I’ll be happy with all the effort. Even if I can’t have a piece of every single pie I wanted, the life that I’m living NOW makes it all worth while. Plus, if I can’t have a piece of the ‘creamy chocolate cheese pie’, then at least I'll know I saved half the calories of one of those 5-7 pounds I’m working on NOW!
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Is enough, enough?
I’ve crossed my path with a young brave girl whose life has been, more than probably, harder than mine, my relatives, friends and people I know, all combined. I met her for the first time just yesterday, although I’ve known about her for awhile. I had been waiting for her to come back from the run and back to the shelter, where she has been more than once before. We had never been introduced, and I know, for sure, I was way more nervous than she was, that’s if she was nervous at all.
Can’t remember how I first started the conversation, all I know is that somehow I managed to learn a lot about her in that first half hour. She even told me about a book she was reading and I made a note to buy it first thing after our meeting.
I bought it and, just by page nine I hit the first ‘I have to underline this’ part. It said: “There comes a time when you’re losing a fight that it just doesn’t make sense to keep on fighting. It’s not that you’re being a quitter, it’s just that you’ve got the sense to know when enough is enough”.
Although it’s a book for the “young reader”, as the big book stores have labeled that section where I got the book from, I’ve only got to Chapter 3 and already am scratching my head. In a good sense, though. It’s just that, here was this young brave girl, reading a book about a 10 year old boy who runs away and has a list of his own “rules and things to have a funner life and make a better liar of yourself”. A book about a boy who, more than certainly, she can identify with, as both have had a really tough life.
Has she got to that point where enough is enough? Unfortunately, her future is still uncertain, and thinking she has hit that spot is not a safe bet. But, it makes me think about all of us who do have that power to say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. All of us who do have alternatives, who do have a helping hand, who do have the resources, who DO know better than to stick around and wait to see what happens.
Those of us who have the power to quit our jobs, to get out of an abusive relationship, to stop complaining about been over weight, to stop whining about what we’ve always wanted to do and make it happen, to step out of our comfort zones…
Some battles are over the moment they started, some aren’t over ‘till they’re over. You won’t know what will happen by standing still. My young brave friend has gone into battle many times, and I don’t see her standing still. She knows is a tough world out there. She’s been there and has come back.
Would you?
Can’t remember how I first started the conversation, all I know is that somehow I managed to learn a lot about her in that first half hour. She even told me about a book she was reading and I made a note to buy it first thing after our meeting.
I bought it and, just by page nine I hit the first ‘I have to underline this’ part. It said: “There comes a time when you’re losing a fight that it just doesn’t make sense to keep on fighting. It’s not that you’re being a quitter, it’s just that you’ve got the sense to know when enough is enough”.
Although it’s a book for the “young reader”, as the big book stores have labeled that section where I got the book from, I’ve only got to Chapter 3 and already am scratching my head. In a good sense, though. It’s just that, here was this young brave girl, reading a book about a 10 year old boy who runs away and has a list of his own “rules and things to have a funner life and make a better liar of yourself”. A book about a boy who, more than certainly, she can identify with, as both have had a really tough life.
Has she got to that point where enough is enough? Unfortunately, her future is still uncertain, and thinking she has hit that spot is not a safe bet. But, it makes me think about all of us who do have that power to say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. All of us who do have alternatives, who do have a helping hand, who do have the resources, who DO know better than to stick around and wait to see what happens.
Those of us who have the power to quit our jobs, to get out of an abusive relationship, to stop complaining about been over weight, to stop whining about what we’ve always wanted to do and make it happen, to step out of our comfort zones…
Some battles are over the moment they started, some aren’t over ‘till they’re over. You won’t know what will happen by standing still. My young brave friend has gone into battle many times, and I don’t see her standing still. She knows is a tough world out there. She’s been there and has come back.
Would you?
Monday, March 12, 2007
Counting blessings
Some of us, if not all of us, sometimes find ourselves complaining about the why’s and how come’s in our lives. I won’t give examples…don’t see why I should waste time on those. Rather, I’ll name many of the blessings I was reminded of today.
Like having a mom who was always there for us and woke up at 5am for years to go to work so that she could send us to a good school and have food on the table each day. For all my friends who have always been there, even with hundreds, even thousands of miles separating us physically. For all the angels that have crossed my path and have opened up doors or closed some old wounds. For having a second chance with my dad, from a better place in my life, one where I can understand and see how great of a human being he is. For waking up each day with a smile on my face, (although I’m not a morning person, ahem). For listening to a good song on my way to work, and getting out of my car happy and ready to start the day. For the weekend at the beach, the day at the park, the unexpected compliment, the sun shinning and the birds singing…
I guess I can continue counting my blessings, but don’t think I’ll be able to stop any time soon. I’m fortunate to have the life I’ve had, and still look forward to what’s ahead. I hope life keeps me grounded so I never forget my blessings, and I’m able to pay it forward in multiples of 100.
Like having a mom who was always there for us and woke up at 5am for years to go to work so that she could send us to a good school and have food on the table each day. For all my friends who have always been there, even with hundreds, even thousands of miles separating us physically. For all the angels that have crossed my path and have opened up doors or closed some old wounds. For having a second chance with my dad, from a better place in my life, one where I can understand and see how great of a human being he is. For waking up each day with a smile on my face, (although I’m not a morning person, ahem). For listening to a good song on my way to work, and getting out of my car happy and ready to start the day. For the weekend at the beach, the day at the park, the unexpected compliment, the sun shinning and the birds singing…
I guess I can continue counting my blessings, but don’t think I’ll be able to stop any time soon. I’m fortunate to have the life I’ve had, and still look forward to what’s ahead. I hope life keeps me grounded so I never forget my blessings, and I’m able to pay it forward in multiples of 100.
Friday, March 9, 2007
Carving the way
Why is it that the small things in life are the ones that give you the most satisfaction? That song that makes you smile all day long, the unexpected phone call from a friend you haven’t talked with for awhile or watching pictures of ‘way back when’.
Lately, for me, it has been all of the above, so I can’t complaint. Though, the best one of all has been reconnecting with friends. It has been amazing how life brings back those that for one reason or another stepped out of your life, just at the right moment and it feels like time never went by. In fact, if it wasn’t for one of them I wouldn’t have started this blog, although it had been running in my head for awhile.
It has been great seeing how things have been aligning themselves carving the way to achieve the goals I've set for this year and how friends have been such an instrumental part of it. Been able to share this with them makes it all worth while.
I am so lucky!
Lately, for me, it has been all of the above, so I can’t complaint. Though, the best one of all has been reconnecting with friends. It has been amazing how life brings back those that for one reason or another stepped out of your life, just at the right moment and it feels like time never went by. In fact, if it wasn’t for one of them I wouldn’t have started this blog, although it had been running in my head for awhile.
It has been great seeing how things have been aligning themselves carving the way to achieve the goals I've set for this year and how friends have been such an instrumental part of it. Been able to share this with them makes it all worth while.
I am so lucky!
Thursday, March 8, 2007
Dinner, laughs and some memories
For the first time since I moved to what has been the best second chance I have had, California, I had a friend visit me, while on a business trip. It was nice for me to actually show somebody where I live, where I hang out and just share how wonderful life has been for me lately.
While having dinner at the best sushi place I’ve been so far, where flavors are blended in ways unimaginable, we shared memories, laughs and good times. She told me about her moving in with her boyfriend (that guy that we had talked about months ago when it all was just starting), the changes in her life as she moved miles away from home to give it a chance, and how she never thought she would have done something like that.
Just that made me think again about how life sometimes ‘just knows better’. How we might plan the perfect life, the perfect relationship, and then we get it, but wrapped up in a different package. And then we are put in a situation were a decision must be made that will ultimately take you back a few steps, or take you forward. And so, my friend took a leap forward and I can’t be more proud of her. Her courage to give it a try, to step out, reminds me that sometimes life is filled with unpredictable strings of circumstances that will test us and set edges which we must learn to polish.
I think the best friends in life are those who teach you the most without any effort, other than that of been a genuine human being. I don’t regret the steps I’ve taken, or cry over the walls I’ve had to brake on my way out of my comfort zone, because the friends that I’ve made on my journey have made it all worth while.
To my friends from Puerto Rico who saw the rough sketches of the person I am today and am still working to become, to my friends from Denver (one in Texas now) who saw me through rough times, and to my friends from California who have given me a new definition of life… I can’t say this enough, thank you
While having dinner at the best sushi place I’ve been so far, where flavors are blended in ways unimaginable, we shared memories, laughs and good times. She told me about her moving in with her boyfriend (that guy that we had talked about months ago when it all was just starting), the changes in her life as she moved miles away from home to give it a chance, and how she never thought she would have done something like that.
Just that made me think again about how life sometimes ‘just knows better’. How we might plan the perfect life, the perfect relationship, and then we get it, but wrapped up in a different package. And then we are put in a situation were a decision must be made that will ultimately take you back a few steps, or take you forward. And so, my friend took a leap forward and I can’t be more proud of her. Her courage to give it a try, to step out, reminds me that sometimes life is filled with unpredictable strings of circumstances that will test us and set edges which we must learn to polish.
I think the best friends in life are those who teach you the most without any effort, other than that of been a genuine human being. I don’t regret the steps I’ve taken, or cry over the walls I’ve had to brake on my way out of my comfort zone, because the friends that I’ve made on my journey have made it all worth while.
To my friends from Puerto Rico who saw the rough sketches of the person I am today and am still working to become, to my friends from Denver (one in Texas now) who saw me through rough times, and to my friends from California who have given me a new definition of life… I can’t say this enough, thank you
Tuesday, March 6, 2007
Win-win situation at crossroads
Many sometimes get to a point in their lives where situations just seem to push them away from their comfort zone and in into a crossroad. If this rings a bell, congratulations. It’s probably because you’ve done so much, you’ve gone so far, you’ve lived the dream… and now you want more.
Now is just a matter of keeping the bell ringing, I mean, the ball rolling. Yes, it started rolling the moment you asked yourself ‘what’s next’. It kept rolling while you were searching on the Internet for possibilities, when you verbalized your desire for a change and when you wrote down steps to take to make ‘what’s next’ a reality.
What beholds? You’ll see how every single step taken and action made will account to help you get closer to your next adventure. As you get closer, you’ll embrace the past and look upon the future. You’ll see why at crossroads, is a win-win situation.
Now is just a matter of keeping the bell ringing, I mean, the ball rolling. Yes, it started rolling the moment you asked yourself ‘what’s next’. It kept rolling while you were searching on the Internet for possibilities, when you verbalized your desire for a change and when you wrote down steps to take to make ‘what’s next’ a reality.
What beholds? You’ll see how every single step taken and action made will account to help you get closer to your next adventure. As you get closer, you’ll embrace the past and look upon the future. You’ll see why at crossroads, is a win-win situation.
Sunday, March 4, 2007
Prince charming, bottom line and other things here and there
After a few consecutive weekends scheduling my time to hang out with a few prospective significant others, it was nice to finally have time to be alone, with my thoughts that is. And that’s because, if there’s a comfort zone I’ve got the most used to is that of been the single gal’ enjoying been single. Although most of the people I know are either married with children, most recently married, or already divorced, I’m still one of those (as society would put it) still single. Does it bother me? Not at all. Do I want a significant other? Absolutely.
So what to do, what to do… put myself out there!!!! How to do it, there’s the challenge (yes, it is a challenge, at least for me). After reading a book that opened up some old wounds, cleared my mind from destructive thinking and gave me a new found perspective about why I might still be single, I’ve taken on the challenge to put myself out there and let some people in into my world, that which I’ve protected for so long. So far…well, I’ve had a few bumps along the ride. Though, there are no regrets. A few bumps here and there are just that, a few bumps. The more I put myself out there, the more I know that there is light at the end of the tunnel and somewhere along the path I’ll come across my prince charming (yeah, yeah, I do believe in those too). A weekend away, not literally, from the dating scene helped me put things back into perspective. What am I looking for after all? A few drinks here and there, or my prince charming/partner in crime/company for the journey?
I guess I’m still working on that one. After all, I just stepped out of that comfort zone. I still have some work to do. In the mean time I’ll keep working on making sure I don’t lose focus of my bottom line. Yes, that which in business terms means net income, but in the dating world would be what you can’t do without; what gives you the most without losing yourself. I know I don’t want a relationship in brackets (is in negative, red, losing rather than gaining), or one that just brakes even. I want one that’s profitable. A win-win relationship. Isn’t that what we all should have?
So what to do, what to do… put myself out there!!!! How to do it, there’s the challenge (yes, it is a challenge, at least for me). After reading a book that opened up some old wounds, cleared my mind from destructive thinking and gave me a new found perspective about why I might still be single, I’ve taken on the challenge to put myself out there and let some people in into my world, that which I’ve protected for so long. So far…well, I’ve had a few bumps along the ride. Though, there are no regrets. A few bumps here and there are just that, a few bumps. The more I put myself out there, the more I know that there is light at the end of the tunnel and somewhere along the path I’ll come across my prince charming (yeah, yeah, I do believe in those too). A weekend away, not literally, from the dating scene helped me put things back into perspective. What am I looking for after all? A few drinks here and there, or my prince charming/partner in crime/company for the journey?
I guess I’m still working on that one. After all, I just stepped out of that comfort zone. I still have some work to do. In the mean time I’ll keep working on making sure I don’t lose focus of my bottom line. Yes, that which in business terms means net income, but in the dating world would be what you can’t do without; what gives you the most without losing yourself. I know I don’t want a relationship in brackets (is in negative, red, losing rather than gaining), or one that just brakes even. I want one that’s profitable. A win-win relationship. Isn’t that what we all should have?
Saturday, March 3, 2007
In the blink of an eye
There are things in life that, when they happen, it just makes us wander why… why could something so terrible happen to someone so fragile and so full of life? And then it hits us. Life changes in the blink of an eye. Sometimes so dramatically that there are no more changes. Life not only happened, it ended.
Having a younger sister is for me, more than having a friend to share stories with, is having someone I can help walk the steps I had skipped, those I didn’t know were there or just avoided, and those that I wish someone would have told me about. So, when a cliff just happened to appear out of nowhere, when life changes in the blink of an eye, I want to be there for her, hold her hand and tell her everything will be alright.
But, miles away from been able to be her shoulder to cry on, to hold her hand and tell her it was in her friend’s life story to only see eighteen candles, it ‘hits home’ and shakes my entire core. How can I tell my younger sister that life just happened, that it was her friend’s time… I’m just out of words, go figure. I’ve never learned what to say, how to deal with it and it keeps shaking my core. I’ve been coaching my sister, pushing her to pursue her goals, to never give up, follow her dreams, and I can’t find the words to be there in this time of sorrow.
I hope she knows that, although I can’t find the words, I’m here for her. That I hope that losing a friend makes her value life and opportunities even more than before. That she finds the strength to keep going and understand that, although life is fragile and sometimes brake, there will be light at the end of the tunnel…
In honor of Miguelina Pomales, RIP
Having a younger sister is for me, more than having a friend to share stories with, is having someone I can help walk the steps I had skipped, those I didn’t know were there or just avoided, and those that I wish someone would have told me about. So, when a cliff just happened to appear out of nowhere, when life changes in the blink of an eye, I want to be there for her, hold her hand and tell her everything will be alright.
But, miles away from been able to be her shoulder to cry on, to hold her hand and tell her it was in her friend’s life story to only see eighteen candles, it ‘hits home’ and shakes my entire core. How can I tell my younger sister that life just happened, that it was her friend’s time… I’m just out of words, go figure. I’ve never learned what to say, how to deal with it and it keeps shaking my core. I’ve been coaching my sister, pushing her to pursue her goals, to never give up, follow her dreams, and I can’t find the words to be there in this time of sorrow.
I hope she knows that, although I can’t find the words, I’m here for her. That I hope that losing a friend makes her value life and opportunities even more than before. That she finds the strength to keep going and understand that, although life is fragile and sometimes brake, there will be light at the end of the tunnel…
In honor of Miguelina Pomales, RIP
Friday, March 2, 2007
Walls, cliffs, road signs and detours
Been young and wanting to take big chunks out of that piece of pie called life every time I could, made me think that, if I didn’t do it as fast as I could, someone else would be getting my piece of the pie, that I would get ‘there’ just a minute too late. And then… life happens. You hit that big wall, you run off that cliff that you just didn’t see coming and you question yourself... is it just too late?
It is never too late. Just keep moving forward. Looking back only makes you wonder “why did I do this in the first place”, when you should be thinking, “I’ll just remember to keep my eyes on the road and just read those damn signs next time”. Stepping out of your comfort zone is not about looking back regretting that big step, that big leap of faith you took when you wanted to make a change in your life. It’s about looking forward, learning from your mistakes and understanding that those walls and cliffs on the roads are just helping you create your road map towards your new destination. If you hit a wall on your way to a new you, you’ll know that second time around you should just make a left, or a right, or just take a detour, as long as you don’t seat still waiting for the wall to, either disappear from the face of the earth, or just crumble into pieces by snapping your fingers. And that cliff you just didn’t see coming either, just wear rock climbing gear next time so you’ll be able to get back up.
I hit a few walls and fell off of a few cliffs on my way to take that big chunk of the pie. With time, those walls became road signs and those cliffs, just detours. Just remember that every step will take you closer to whatever it is you’re looking for, wherever it is you want to go. It wouldn’t hurt to update your map on a regular basis either. Remember life changes in the blink of an eye...
It is never too late. Just keep moving forward. Looking back only makes you wonder “why did I do this in the first place”, when you should be thinking, “I’ll just remember to keep my eyes on the road and just read those damn signs next time”. Stepping out of your comfort zone is not about looking back regretting that big step, that big leap of faith you took when you wanted to make a change in your life. It’s about looking forward, learning from your mistakes and understanding that those walls and cliffs on the roads are just helping you create your road map towards your new destination. If you hit a wall on your way to a new you, you’ll know that second time around you should just make a left, or a right, or just take a detour, as long as you don’t seat still waiting for the wall to, either disappear from the face of the earth, or just crumble into pieces by snapping your fingers. And that cliff you just didn’t see coming either, just wear rock climbing gear next time so you’ll be able to get back up.
I hit a few walls and fell off of a few cliffs on my way to take that big chunk of the pie. With time, those walls became road signs and those cliffs, just detours. Just remember that every step will take you closer to whatever it is you’re looking for, wherever it is you want to go. It wouldn’t hurt to update your map on a regular basis either. Remember life changes in the blink of an eye...
Thursday, March 1, 2007
Out of the comfort zone... how it all began
When I first decided to step out of my comfort zone I didn’t know what I was getting myself into. I guess not knowing, but really wanting to do something to look back and be proud of, was enough encouragement to pack my things and leave ‘home’. Although with time we tend to forget, if not erase the past, I still remember vividly the enthusiasm I felt waiting at the airport terminal and talking to an old couple about the new adventure I was embarking. They looked at me with their ‘you are so young, you should be proud of yourself’ look, that it really made me feel proud of myself. We chatted for awhile and then we all boarded our respective flights.
I arrived at around seven at night, although it looked more like four in the afternoon. I thought I had heard on the news that it was going to be cold that day, and I say thought because I arrived wearing boots, black pants and long sleeve turtleneck to an 80 degrees autumn afternoon, which felt more like summer. I did all the things I had to settle in my new home, a home that, that first day, was filled with no more than my bags, myself and my hope.
From day one I had already learned my first lesson. Being a stubborn ‘I don’t ask for help’ kind of person, by myself and three floors of stairs to take my bags up to, the words just came out of my mouth as if I’ve been saying them for years, “could you please help me…”. Up the stairs and into my new home I said the words I have been saying for years and had taken me so many places… thank you.
And so, I had stepped out of my comfort zone, miles away from home. It was going to be a new beginning, a new life, a new adventure. Now, it’s been 1 year, 4 months and 21 days. I count them all, because all of them count. It’s been days of ups and downs, chattered dreams but endless hope, and I wouldn’t change it for the world.
I arrived at around seven at night, although it looked more like four in the afternoon. I thought I had heard on the news that it was going to be cold that day, and I say thought because I arrived wearing boots, black pants and long sleeve turtleneck to an 80 degrees autumn afternoon, which felt more like summer. I did all the things I had to settle in my new home, a home that, that first day, was filled with no more than my bags, myself and my hope.
From day one I had already learned my first lesson. Being a stubborn ‘I don’t ask for help’ kind of person, by myself and three floors of stairs to take my bags up to, the words just came out of my mouth as if I’ve been saying them for years, “could you please help me…”. Up the stairs and into my new home I said the words I have been saying for years and had taken me so many places… thank you.
And so, I had stepped out of my comfort zone, miles away from home. It was going to be a new beginning, a new life, a new adventure. Now, it’s been 1 year, 4 months and 21 days. I count them all, because all of them count. It’s been days of ups and downs, chattered dreams but endless hope, and I wouldn’t change it for the world.
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